Gift fic for yun_miyake

Title: Some Fancy Shoes
Pairing: Aiba Masaki x Ninomiya Kazunari
Rating: PG
Warnings: Crack and Total Nonsense
Summary: Two brothers living in a box go on a "gem" of an adventure.
Notes: Please enjoy this steaming pile of crack! I tried my best >.<


Kazunari lies napping in a crudely repurposed cardboard box just outside the city. He's covered in a ragged blanket and many layers of what seem to be clean clothes laid carefully on top. He always naps while his brother, Masaki, goes out to beg for leftover food off the city businessmen and women as they finish up their daily luncheons. The brothers are old enough to make lives for themselves, but they are content with living a spontaneous, on-the-edge, and nomadic kind of life. Their area has a few other people nearby, guarding their make-shift homes, but none were there by choice.

A quick gust of wind slips through split corners on the box. Kazunari huffs a sigh and rolls over as the cold air brushes up under his blanket. He covers one foot with the other to combat the cold, but to no avail. He sits up and wraps himself in the piles of clothes and the ratty blanket.

"Masaki...you're so slow..." he whispers, reaching for a now half-cold can of coffee he bought with money he'd dug out from a gutter. He takes a sip and holds it between his hands. He turns slightly and opens a small window-like flap at the back of the large box. There is nothing out of the ordinary, so he lets the flap go and it springs back into a closed position. He sighs once more when he hears footsteps hustling back toward the box. A shadow appears in front of the door flap and Kazunari holds his breath. The papery door pops open.

"Kazu, I found a sandwich, a couple french fries, and a half-eaten burrito!" Masaki says. His smile is beaming, a stark opposite of Kazunari's glowering expression.

"You were gone for way too long this time...you don't have anything to show for it..." Kazunari sighs. He sips his coffee again and licks his lips. Masaki puts the plastic bag of food on font of Kazunari.

"It's more than yesterday. The burrito is huge. Some guy in a fishing vest gave it to me because he wanted to try something new, but he liked fish better," Masaki says sitting across from Kazunari. He bends his head down slightly because the cardboard box's ceiling was rather low for his tall frame.

"That sounds stupid of him. If he just liked fish, why'd he try a burrito?" Kazunari grumbles.

"Oh stop, just eat the burrito, it'll make you less crabby," Masaki says, taking the tinfoil-wrapped burrito out of the plastic bag. He sets it in Kazunari's lap, "See? It's still warm!" Kazunari takes the burrito in his hands. His expressions warms up and he gives Masaki a defeated smile.

"You didn't put it in your pants, did you?" Kazunari asks, his eyes narrowing just a slight bit.

"Of course not! It's warm because I got it right before coming home! The fishing guy had it in his vest pocket," Masaki says. He pulls open his own coat and mimes putting a burrito in a vest pocket. Kazunari opens the tinfoil burrito bundle and sniffs at a piece of chicken sticking out.

"It must be a pretty big pocket," Kazunari says shortly before taking a small bite.

"You've got to believe me when I said this guy is a fishing guy. He looks burnt from the sun and smells like sea salt!" Masaki exclaims.

"Calm yourself. Just eat the sandwich. We can split the fries," Kazunari commands, a few pieces of rice topple down into his lap. He sips his coffee, savoring the last drop for the final bite of the large burrito.

A short while later, after they clean up the mess and find a trash can to dump the wrappers (they kept the tinfoil), Kazunari hands Masaki a heavy sweater from the pile of clean clothes draped around him.

"An old lady saw me and felt bad. She gave me the sweater. It might fit you," Kazunari says while pawing through the other clothes in the pile. Masaki takes the sweater and hoists it above his head. His arms get stiff, but he still pulls it down. He makes a gasping sound. When the bottom of the sweater rests at the middle of his stomach and his arms are stiffly stuck in a weird position, Kazunari laughs.

"You knew it wouldn't fit when your shoulders wouldn't fit," he complains, poking at Masaki's exposed, but t-shirt-covered stomach. Masaki laughs and grins.

"I thought it would make you laugh. It's made for a small person anyway," he says, trying to lift it off. It's stuck. Kazunari steps in and attempts to pull the sweater off Masaki's shoulders.

"Don't call me small! If I'm small, you're a giant beast!" Kazunari says, roughly tugging the sweater. It catches around Masaki's chin, but he keeps tugging.

"Ow ow ow! Stop pulling!" Masaki whines, "You're not small..." Kazunari gently takes the sweater off from around Masaki's neck and stashes it amongst the hoard of other clothes. "When will you wear that?" Masaki asks. Kazunari rolls his eyes and stays covered in the pile.

"I'll wear it some time. Maybe next week," Kazunari says, once again, pawing through the clothing. It was clear that the pile belonged to Kazunari as Masaki had a small crumpled pile in the corner acting as insulation from the cold. Masaki fiddles around with something in his pocket. Kazunari doesn't notice at first and then sees it.

"Eh? Don't be doing what I think you're doing..." Kazunari says. He gives him a shifty glance. Masaki blushes furiously.

"I'm not doing that!" Masaki says, "I have something for you. I found it in a parking lot near the Science Museum."

Kazunari blinks, "You went all the way there today? Why?"

"I thought that I needed a new begging spot. The restaurant people are getting annoyed with me..." Masaki says, still fiddling with something in his pocket.

"Well, what is it?" Kazunari asks. He leans forward to try and see.

Masaki pulls out an amber stone with a mosquito trapped inside, "It's yellow. You like yellow, so I thought it would be a good gift..." Kazunari stares at the stone.

"Aren't these expensive. You didn't steal it, did you?" Kazunari asks, gazing at the beautiful stone.

"No, no, I found it lying in the parking lot, honestly," Masaki says playing with the amber stone in his hands. He holds the stone out to Kazunari, "It's yours."

Kazunari takes the stone in his hands and a small light begins to grow inside. "Woah!" he says, does it have a battery or something?" Masaki shakes his head and examines the rock glowing brighter in Kazunari's hands. He touches it and recoils.

"It's hot! How is it not burning you?" Masaki exclaims. He's quite shocked at the heat of the stone and wonders if Kazunari is okay.

"It's fine...it actually feels nice and warm," Kazunari replies, cupping the stone, "Ah, it's getting brighter..." A misshapen portal opens and they both rightfully begin to worry. Kazunari feels his body being drawn into the portal and soon cannot stop it. Fearing for his brother, Masaki grabs into Kazunari's arm just as he's about to disappear. They're both swallowed by the portal.
***

Kazunari wakes up sweating and in a daze, "M-Masaki?" He looks around. They are in a cave lit by flowing magma in a cavern below. They seem to have landed in a location where their bodies were safe from being incinerated, and there is a long, dimly lit path ahead of them. The temperature is uncomfortably hot, but bearable. Masaki lies in a heap behind Kazu and groans softly.

"What happened?" Masaki says, trying to untwist his limbs.

Kazunari looks around some more and sees the amber stone resting on some fallen rock near the wall. He crawls over to it and takes it in his hands. He wishes silently to be ported back to the city, but the stone stays dark. He smacks the stone against the ground a few times. "Why won't it light up this time? There's got to be a way to use it to get back..." he says standing up. He slowly makes his way over to Masaki who is still stretching out his body from being dumped onto the ground from the mysterious portal.

"Did you make a wish?" Masaki says innocently.

Kazunari sneers, "Of course I tried! You got us into this situation...burritos and fishermen...stolen rocks..."

"I didn't steal it, I found it. And that fisherman was nice. The burrito was warm wasn't it?" Masaki replies, finally getting up and brushing dirt and small rock fragments off himself. "Wow, it's hot down here isn't it?" While Masaki is talking to himself, Kazunari is messing with something around the corner. "Kazu...what are you doing? Are you okay?" Kazunari returns with a ratty satchel in his arms.

"Some conveniently left behind equipment...and a map," he says. Kazunari takes the map out of the bag and lays it on the ground at Masaki's feet. He points to a giant red arrow, "We are here." He points his finger to the red arrow.

"Well that makes sense," Masaki replies, holding in a chuckle.

"You idiot, I know that. I wasn't finished talking..." Kazunari snaps. He rolls his eyes before continuing, "Anyway, we are here and there is a small path from here that leads to here, a door." His finger follows the faded image to what looks like an aged wooden door. "We should be able to find an exit here," he says. He watches as Masaki tries to dry the sweat from his face using his hand. It leaves a dark, dirt smear across his forehead and the bridge of his nose. Kazunari ignores it completely.

Kazunari hands Masaki the map, "Don't lose it. You're my navigator." Masaki takes the map from Kazunari's hands and holds it tight.

"Roger captain!" Masaki says gleefully, wiping his face of sweat once more. Kazunari rolls his eyes again and they begin walking the small trail.

The cavern gets hotter and hotter until it's so humid that it's difficult to breathe. Despite that, they begin to walk faster.

They trudge along for what seems to be hours, when Masaki stops abruptly.

"Ah!" he shrieks. Kazunari jumps at the sound.

"Eh? What is it?" he asks, concerned.

"There's red text appearing!" Masaki says thrusting the map into Nino's hands. Sure enough, there was red text developing on the map showing an actual defined trail. At the end is a red star that becomes more vivid with time.

"It's magic!" Masaki exclaims.

Kazunari scoffs, "It's not magic, Masaki..."

"So you're saying it's magic," Masaki replies, pointing at the mysterious red markings. Kazunari rips the map from Masaki's hands and looks at it. The red track on the map shifts to a green. Green text appears at the end of the map trail. Uppercase and bold, it states, "EMERALD. MAKE A WISH." Kazunari continues walking along the path shown on the map with Masaki on his heels.

"I'll wish for—," Masaki begins.

"Just don't..." Kazunari complains.

"—a fancy house, car...shoes," Masaki continues.

There is a slight rumbling in the volcanic cavern below them. Some loose boulders tumble down into the darkness. Kazunari walks faster, his left hand resting on the cavern wall for guidance and stability. Neither speaks a word for an awkward length of time. After wandering deeper into the increasing darkness, the temperature becomes unbearable. Masaki has long discarded his shirt, his pants wrapped as a turban on his head. Kazunari, on the other hand, remains sweating through a thin shirt. He stops for a moment to wipe his eyes with the hem.

"This is ridiculous..." he says rolling up his pants as high as they'll go.

"You look dumb," Masaki says, holding in a mocking chuckle. He is punched in the arm.

"Shut up. You're the one wandering a dirty cave is his underwear..." Kazunari snaps. There is another rumble that is much more noticeable than the previous. The two stop until the ground stop shaking. Once the movement ceases, they continue on as fast as their dehydrating bodies can handle. Kazunari hands Masaki the map as they walk, "Can you read it? The sweat makes my eyes blurry."

Masaki takes the map. "We're one pinky finger tip away from the emerald," he says. Kazunari groans, obviously feeling weak from the lack of water.

"Pinky finger, what?" Kazunari says taking the map back, "You mean we're close?"

"Yep. Prepare your wish. Soon I'll have fancy shoes," Masaki beams.

They continue their journey at a slower pace due to the intense heat. Soon, in the distance, Masaki spots an opening ahead that is black with a few twinkling lights peering out. At this point, Masaki is leading his companion around by the hand, preventing him from swan-diving off the cliffside into the flaming hot magma to end it all. Kazunari groans loudly.

"Kazu! Lights!" Masaki shouts. He drags Kazunari to the scantly lighted opening. Inside are small crystals imbedded in the walls. "We're close!" he shouts once more. Kazunari just bubbles at the mouth in response. Masaki notices that none of the stones are green, but they get larger the further down the passage. Ash Masaki leads Kazunari into the gradually brightening corridor, the temperature drops significantly. Kazunari recovers only slightly. They reach a dead end and Masaki consults the map while Kazunari lies on the ground, letting cave water slowly drip into his mouth from a crystal stalactite like an IV. Masaki feels along the walls until he finds a smallish hole leading down into the unknown.

"Ne, Kazu..." Masaki says.

Kazunari whines, "I know that tone. No."

"Oh come on! I'm too big. My shoulders won't even clear the outside..." Masaki says poking Kazunari with his foot.

"And what if I get stuck? You'll get scared and leave me and I'll die half stuck in a hole like a fat dopey bear. You know. That honey loving bear or whatever..." Kazunari complains. There is a long pause and stared-down between the two. Masaki breaks out the puppy eyes only thirty seconds in.

"And there it is. Can't you cut me some slack. Sheesh...." Kazunari sighs. He rolls down the legs of his pants to cover his knees and crawls to the hole. He peeks his head in and sees a bright mist emanating from somewhere on the other side. "Hold onto my feet, okay?"

Masaki complies and holds Kazunari's feet and he climbs into the hole. He winces and jerks around until he is engulfed by the hole.

"Are you okay?" Masaki calls.

"Yeah...I'll have some bruises though..." Kazunari replies. On his hands and knees, he makes his way in the tiny passage to a more open area, leaving Masaki far behind. Masaki worries, but trusts his brother.

The cavern opens up enough for Kazunari to stand up in. He follows the green light to a separate chamber.

"Ah!" he shouts. It's the emerald. Strangely, it's fairly large and already cut into shape. He feels warmth coming from his pants pocket. Looking down, he sees a soft amber light. Kazunari takes the amber stone from his pocket. It is glowing. "This is it..."

Kazunari takes the emerald stone in his free hand and immediately the cavern begins to shake. He loses his footing and tumbles to the ground. While scrambling to regain his footing, he hears Masaki shouting.

"Kazu! What's happening? This place is coming down!"

With both stones in hand, he manages to stumble his way back through the open corridor and then through the rabbit hole. He waits at the bottom because he'll need Masaki's help to get out. The ground begins to break up underneath him and he starts to panic.

"Masaki! You gotta come to me!" Kazunari shouts desperately.

"Eh? Why? I won't fit!"

"If I go back up I'll be gutted. Just...come on!"

"But, I don't think I can..."

Masaki begins to wedge himself into the small hole. as predicted, he gets stuck. The shaking earth gives him some extra room to wiggle, but it's no use. Kazunari sees Masaki's arms flailing through the opening.

"Ma-chan, I'm gonna pull you, okay?" Kazunari warns. He grabs Masaki's arms tightly.

"W-wait!" Masaki protests.

Kazunari pulls hard and Masaki is birthed into the small, collapsing chamber. His clothes are shredded from the sharp rock. He swats Kazunari's hands off his and nurses his scrapes and cuts.

"Dummy! Make a damn wish!" Kazunari yells, thrusting the large emerald into Masaki's hands. The small cave passage crumbles and traps them in on both sides. Masaki closes his eyes and makes a silent wish. They are suddenly swallowed by a strong emerald light as the rest of the passage collapses.

When they awake, they're sitting on a leather couch in a sizeable living room with a big screen TV and other amenities included in the high life. Masaki looks down.

"I got my fancy shoes!" he exclaims.

"This is lame. I got nothing..." Kazunari quips.

***
"What are you saying?" Masaki says, munching on a soggy piece of bread.

"It's lame. All that and I got nothing..." Kazunari replies, "That story was terrible. It didn't make any sense." He plays with the amber stone and holds it up to the narrow ray of light slicing through a split corner of the box.

Masaki taps Kazunari on the shoulder.

"What...?" Kazunari snaps and elbows him.

Masaki points downward where a pair of sexy leather shoes are neatly and snugly fitted to his feet.

"At least I got my fancy shoes!" he exclaims.

Kazunari stares at them dumbfounded, "What the fuck?"