Back to Chapter 1 – Part 2


CHAPTER 2


The Princess in the Flames
A short story by Ninomiya Kazunari

Despite being a princess, when the youngest daughter of the most powerful clan in the southern countries was a child, she loved playing outside. Grown up, surrounded by the large fields of crop and flowers, it must be natural. She loved sitting at the nearby river, watching the fishes scrimmaging around underneath the small waves, the silver scales shimmering like little diamonds. She loved climbing on the highest trees in the Lord's gardens, trying to pick some of the pink peaches or purple plums and she loved playing in the dirt, catching lizards to make friends with them.

In the afternoon, when the little princess got called inside of the mansion, already prepared to get scolded for her behaviour, for dirtying her precious kimonos and messing up her thick, black hair, she didn't mind. She listened to her mother, the lord's wife, to her maid who had to fight with the dirt on her clothes and the leaves and branches in the girl's hair when she bathed her afterwards. Though, whenever the little princess climbed on her father's lap at the end of the day, to get taught something or to listen to a short good night story he would tell her, he never scolded her. Instead, he told her enthusiastically, that his daughter should live to her fullest and play outside as much as she wished, until one day she would have to become a noble samurai's wife and make him happy.

At this time, the princess still didn't know what it meant to become someone's wife or what it meant to make someone happy but she knew that she never wanted to stop playing with the fishes and the lizards outside and tasting the fresh and sweet peaches from her parent's gardens. Bearing these thoughts in mind, she dreamed about making her future husband amazed by the colours of nature and making him taste her favourite fruits, hoping that he would share her likings.

The princess was about thirteen years old, when she met her destined husband for the first time. He was the eldest son of the most powerful warlord from the other side of the country, coming from the pine trees in the high north.

When the young lord and his father, a very tall man, were guests in the house in the large fields, in order to train their swords and talk to the princess' father about economic and strategic plans regarding a war alliance, things the princess didn't know about and wasn’t interested in anyway, she would peek through the doors and eavesdrop on them, curious about the boy accompanying the tall samurai. He must be about her age, maybe a little bit older but still much too young for war and he didn't share the princess' lively and happy feelings at all. He just sat there besides his father, a strict expression on his face and an empty look in his eyes. It was a very sad view in her opinion.

She wanted to run into the room, barge into the conversation and grab the boy's hand to drag him outside into the gardens, showing him the beauty of the world and make him smile. And this was what she did on the third day after the samurai and his son arrived and it made her heart bloom that she succeeded and earned the boy's sincere smile when she introduced him to the blue blue sky and gave him a peach to taste its sweetness. It was worth the scolding from her parents that the princess had to endure afterwards.

Three years later, the samurai and his son visited their country again and even if the boy was still far from being an adult, he had grown up nicely, his face matured, his voice deepened and if the princess missed the boy she knew from three years ago, she now knew why - she was in love with this young man.

When they met outside in the garden, the princess, still her usual young wild self, wanted to climb a tree to get her favourite peaches for her young samurai, she was so nervous that she didn't pay enough attention and slipped from one of the thick branches, falling to the ground. Preparing for the pain to meet her body, she closed her eyes but instead of onto the hard ground, she fell right into the young samurai's strong arms, catching her without faltering.

The young man pressed the princess close to his chest and she could feel his excited heartbeat through the fabric of his dark purple hakama as she put her hand against him. This was when the young samurai told the princess that he was here to take her with him, up to the north, to the pine trees, to his home castle, and that he wanted her to marry him.

It might have been a political alliance arranged by their fathers, but in fact for the princess and her samurai, it was no different from a celebration of their innocent, young love. With her cheeks coloured in a nice red, she accepted his proposal happily and followed him into his hometown, taking along her family for a huge wedding celebration, the most beautiful and colourful she could ever imagine.

They loved each other, truly, and the samurai wanted to make his princess happy, even if her family had to leave to return to the south and she would stay home at his castle, even if he had to leave and fight in the war. Knowing that the princess could easily get depressed over the long cold winter months in the north, he made sure to bring her back to her southern home at least once a year, to enable her to see her family and friends, to eat lots of her beloved peaches from the gardens.

The two of them were happy for years and soon, they even got blessed with a child, but then, the war became heavier and harder and the samurai had to leave his castle more and more often, leaving behind his wife and child, in order to save his lands. His wife was praying each and every day for him to return safely and she used to tell her child stories over stories about her beloved husband to keep his vision vivid, to keep his presence, even if he was far away.

It was unlucky that one of the samurai's enemies played a wicked game and used dirty methods while trying to achieve victory and with this, the princess and her child fell victim to such devilish plans. Nobody noticed the assassin entering the castle's grounds in the protection of the dark night, unseen by the guards at the gates. Nobody noticed that this assassin, who checked that every soul in the house was sleeping, started a fire and when it got noticed, it was already too late.

While the house was collapsing, the wood cracking and the paper doors burning in the brightest light, the princess was holding her little crying child close to her chest. Helplessly caught within the flames, she was praying to get reborn at some place, at some time, together with her beloved husband and her beloved child, so that they would have the chance to live together and love each other for one more time.

When the samurai returned to the castle in the north, the war was won, but he found his home destroyed and his wife and child dead. He had to realize that he had lost something much more important and his heart cried more tears than his eyes could shed.

When the pain became unbearable, winter fell in his blackened heart and froze his feelings. The samurai reached for his katana and decided to follow his beloved. While the red liquid, even darker than the reddest flames could be, spread from his body, he was ready to leave this world behind, hoping to be able to embrace his princess and their child once more in the afterlife.

Then, it greened again.

THE END


- - + SAKURAI SHO + - -


Sho closes the issue of Seijo University's campus magazine in which Ninomiya's story is printed, certified as one of the winning entries to the university's literature contest of the past year, with a printed seal at the beginning of the story. At the end of the story, there's a capture of a small review.

"Ninomiya Kazunari manages to capture the beauty of words in a positive but sad love-story, using colours to paint our imaginations. He does not fail to hurt our hearts, showing us the happiness of a couple, before he rips them out of life – just too realistically – but still gives us the hint of hope to believe in the afterlife and the possibility of reincarnation of lovers' souls."
Sakamoto Masayuki, Professor for Japanese and English literature

The young assistant professor darts his look at the wall in front of him behind his desk, not paying attention particularly to the pin board hanging there, which is covered all over with photos and sticky notes, or the shadows from the desk lamp drawing patterns on it, but letting his mind wander.

He thinks about Ninomiya's story again. It's like what Professor Sakamoto wrote, a sad but beautiful story. With a very tragic ending. It hurts Sho, maybe more than it should. It was just a story after all, wasn't it? But somehow it felt a bit familiar, as if it happened to someone he knows. Further, even if Professor Sakamoto pointed to that hint of hope offered by Ninomiya through mentioning the praying of the characters to get born again, there was no final statement that it would really happen, not even with that last sentence. It was up to the readers to believe or not to believe that the couple would get reborn and be able to meet again and Sho wondered, if Ninomiya himself believes in it or not.

Remembering the appearance of the young man, as they met for the first time this morning during Professor Sakamoto's first lecture of the semester, Sho felt his heartbeat speeding up again. Ninomiya has left a very strong impression on him, making him feel like they knew each other.

- + -

Sho finds himself dressed in a dark blue kimono, sitting at the low but spacious dining table in a familiar mansion. There aren't many people sitting at the table, his mother and one of his sisters, the one who is still unmarried, and they are eating in silence. When they finished dinner, his mother and sister stand up and leave, talking about a stroll through the gardens in the evening sun. Sho waits until the servants put away the empty plates and bowls; and waits until only one of the servants is left in the room.

He reaches his hand to grip the young man's wrist, holding him back as he wants to take away a tray with empty tea cups. The young man turns around, looking at Sho with his dark brown eyes, questioning.

"I have to talk to you, please come to my room later," Sho says in a low voice, so that nobody else would be able to hear them even if someone is still around.

"Certainly, Mylord," the servant answers and nods with a small smile on his lips before he leaves the room.

Sho feels his heartbeat running, the pleasant anticipation running through his veins and he knows that he is smiling too. He gets up and walks through the wooden corridors to his room, getting changed into his night wear and sits down at the low table on which a book and a letter are prepared. There is still some light from the outside shining through the paper doors, but nevertheless he lights the candles in the paper lamps, one on the table, the other on the floor, close to his futon to brighten the room. He takes another look at the letter that he received this morning, reading through the few but beautifully written lines before he puts it back aside and dives into the story of his book for a few more pages until someone silently knocks at his door.

"Come in," Sho replies, putting away the book and when the paper door slides open, it's the young servant from before, who enters the room after quickly glancing through the corridors to make sure he isn't seen.

"You wanted to talk to me?" the young man asks.

Sho flashes him a smile and pats on the letter lying in front of him on top of the table. "You know, my friend from the north is planning to get married to a princess from the south. I just received the invitation to their wedding ceremony."

"A wedding ceremony?"

"Yes, and I want you to come along with me on that journey."

"You mean, as your servant," the young man wants to confirm.

"Well, yes, of course," Sho replies, even if he sounds a little bitter. "I would love to take you with me as my partner, but you know it's impossible."

The other man nods, hanging his head. "Yes, I know."

"However, I don't want to leave you behind for too long," Sho says, leaning his chin on one of his hands, looking up to the young man who was still standing next to the door. His eyes are filled with love and his voice has turned into a low whisper when he continues. "I would miss you so badly."

The servant lifts his head again, his face flushed red when he looks at Sho. "Me too," he whispers back and he looks kind of desperate. "I'd die if we're separated for too long. I'll gladly accompany you, my Lord."

Sho chuckles, finding the other man just too adorable. "Come here," he says, patting on the floor right next to him and the servant immediately complies. Sho leans closer, until his lips almost brush the young man's ear. "How did I tell you to call me when we are on our own?"

Shivering slightly from the excitement, the young servant gulps before he looks at Sho directly into the eyes. His lips part for another whisper. "Shota…"

"Right," Sho smiles happily, his heartbeat perceptible all over his body and mind. He reaches his hand up to the man's red cheeks, caressing his lover's beautiful face. "Please call me like that, not Mylord."

"Sure, Shota," this sweet voice, this cute face, this adorable man is driving Sho crazy.

"Much better," he smiles satisfied and leans closer, brushing his lips against the young servant’s.

They share light kisses for a while, Sho caressing the young man's face over and over, guiding his hand in his neck to play with the short black hair in the nape and bringing his hand up on the back of his head, burying his fingers passionately in the thick, soft hair. Sho enjoys the kiss, but somehow, something seems a little off. His partner answers his kisses, but he seems a bit distracted, he isn't fully concentrated. Sho breaks the kiss, looking at his lover, worried. The young man, his cheeks still flushed, averts his eyes, sheepishly.

"What's wrong, you look worried, my dear," Sho asks, his hands all over the young man's face to caress him, to make him talk to him.

"Uhm well…," the young man stammered. "I was just wondering… ah, it might be a stupid thought, please forget it."

"Hm? What is it?" Sho asks, not letting the other push his worries away with a troublesome statement like that. He whispers softly. "You know you can tell or ask me anything, right?"

His lover lifts one of his hands, putting it on top of Sho's and the warmth of their hands mix pleasantly. Still, Sho feels the worry, the nervousness coming from the young servant. "Won't you have to marry a princess too one day?"

Sho feels the stab in his heart, the same that the other man must feel right now, right there in his own heart too. So this is where the worry is coming from. He sighs but doesn't leave his lover's touch, looking at him with slightly sad eyes.

"… I assume I will have to, sooner or later, even if I tried to avoid it so far."

The other man closes his eyes, presses Sho's hand firmer against his face. "I wished, I could be a princess, then," he whispers.

"You are my princess," Sho answers seriously. "The love of my life."

A soft chuckle leaves the young servant's throat as he allows his lips to curl up into a small sad smile and opens his eyes again. "I love your humour. But seriously, if I at least was a woman…"

It almost breaks Sho's heart to hear that and he wants to try everything possible to make the other forget this thought right away. "Don't say that. I don't want you to be a woman. I love you the way you are. I'm truly sorry though that I cannot marry you. I'd love to."

"May I stay with you?" the servant finally asks, his voice barely heard.

"What do you mean?"

"If you ever get married, may I stay with you? Like this?" the young man asks again and Sho's heart skips a beat.

"Of course," he says. "I will never leave you."

"Then I will be your secret mistress."

"You will be the brightest star on my night sky when we'll meet," Sho swears and he means it.

"You are so cheesy, really," his lover chuckles again, this time it sounds genuine.

"You like it cheesy, don't you, my little princess?" Sho dares to tease the other, smiling at him.

"So I'm your princess?"

Sho nods persuasively. "Risking to be cheesy again, I say, you're at least the only princess in my heart."

"I'm relieved then and yes, I kind of like your cheesiness," the other answers but suddenly, there was that sadness back in his eyes, his voice breaking at the end of the sentence and even in the dim light, Sho can spot shiny tears forming in his lover's eyes.

"Hey, dear…," he tries to soothe the young man, brushing his thumb over his wet cheek. "Don't cry, please…"

"I'm sorry," the other replies, taking a deep breath and trying to gulp down his sadness. "You say such wonderful things and I cry… sorry for ruining the mood. I'm too sensitive."

Sho smiles. "You can indeed compete with a woman regarding your sensitivity. But I may say that I do love your sensitivity very much, Kazu. In every way."

He leans forward again, his hands still cupping the young man's face, and again their lips meet for a tender kiss before Sho breaks it again, just to slightly brush his lips against his lover's cheeks, kissing away the tears. He kisses him again on the lips, his hands slowly wandering down from the young man's cheeks along his neck, slipping under the collar of his simple kimono. Sho slightly pushes the fabric from the young man's shoulders to undress him.

Feeling his lover's breath hitch before a small moan leaves his lips, Sho smirks against the other's lips while he lets his hand wander further, along the soft skin, down his chest. His fingers ghost over the tiny nipples, brush around the cute belly bottom and finally find their way between his lover's legs as Sho lays him on the ground, holding him in his strong arms, their lips never parting for too long.

The dim light of the paper lamp near the futon, on which the young man's head is bedded, creates an interesting play of light and shadows on the young servant's face. His dark eyes shine, and Sho starts one of his favourite games – drawing patterns between those cute tiny moles spread all over the young man's face. Sho leans down again, kissing each and every one of it, tenderly. How much he loves this beautiful face, how much he loves this wonderful man, he cannot put it into proper words and so he lets his kisses speak.

- + -

This time, when Sho wakes up, he's lying on his back in his bed, the blanket partly pushed aside and his whole body sweating. His breath hitches, his heartbeat is running and he feels just hot. He lifts his hand, brushing it over his sweaty forehead and feels how his cheeks are burning.

He just had a very sensual, and in the ending very sexual, dream of himself and Ninomiya Kazunari. Fuck.

Sho would be lying if he says that he isn't surprised. He just dreamed the usual setting, about himself being the son of a war lord in ancient Japan, about him leading a secret love life with one of his servants. But the difference from his usual dreams is that while he can never remember his lover's face when he woke up, this time he remembers it perfectly and it is undoubtedly that of the young student he just met the other day.

How is this possible, Sho wonders, rubbing his eyes. Did he dream about him because he stared at the student too long yesterday? Because he read his short story, set in ancient Japan, just before he fell asleep? But for some reason, Sho is convinced that these are not the reasons why he dreamed about him. It wasn't the first time he dreamed about this man, it was just the first time that he can actually remember his face. Thinking about it, this kind of seems to make no sense at all but at the same time, it does make so much sense, it feels like an enlightment, like he just discovered an answer that has been in front of him forever, ready to be found out.

Despite his confusion, Sho cannot longer hold back a wide smile adorning his lips. Finally. Finally he is able to see the man of his dreams. Finally, he knows who he is. Maybe, this doesn't make too much sense yet but for some reason, the young man is convinced that this means the meeting of him and Ninomiya is fated. And he has to meet him again, no matter what.

After a quick shower, which Sho definitely needs after this night, he rushes into the kitchen of his apartment, finding his roommate Aiba Masaki sitting at the kitchen table with a mug filled with freshly brewed coffee and a newspaper in his hands, only his messed up, reddish brown hair sticking up behind it.

"Ah, you made coffee already, that's awesome!" Sho exclaims.

"Please help yourself," Aiba murmurs, gesturing with his own still half-filled cup of coffee.

Sho doesn't think twice before reaching into the cupboard, getting his own mug and fills it while humming some happy song that's stuck in his head. His roommate lowers the newspaper a little and with lifted eyebrows gives his friend a slightly critical look.

"No offence but since this is really rare and in the early morning, I have to ask," he says after clearing his throat. "Sho-kun, did something happen? You look so… happy."

His friend starts laughing as he sits down with his coffee and a slice of toast and marmalade that he prepared quickly. "You say this as if I'm usually never this happy."

"Well, at least not to such an extent," Aiba points out. "People might believe that you just fell in love or something."

Sho continues humming happily, his smile getting even wider. When his friend doesn't stop staring at him, he puts down his knife and toast and explains. "You know what, Aiba, I think, that's exactly what happened."

"Excuse me?" the other lifts his eyebrows in disbelief.

"Yeah," Sho continues, all smiles. "I think, I'm in love."

Aiba finally pushes away the newspaper, as if he never had an interest in it in the first place. He looks at his friend with big, exciting eyes. "Whoa, really!? Tell me more! What happened, who is it? Do I know him? Does he like you too?"

"His name is Ninomiya Kazunari. He's one of Sakamoto-sensei's students," Sho starts. "He's a budding young writer, I met him yesterday at Sakamoto's lecture."

"And then?" his room mate sharpens his ears, preparing for an interesting story.

Which didn't really follow. Sho just shrugged his shoulders instead. "Then? Nothing. I just met him."

Aiba blanked. Honestly, he is expecting a little more. "So, did you talk and got along well immediately? Did you go for a date after the lecture?"

Sho chuckles. "Ah no… I would have loved to, though."

"OK, so let me summarize that. It's simply you having fallen in love at first sight with a student in the lecture hall?" Aiba asks to make sure.

"To be honest, I'm not completely sure but I think that's not exactly what it is," Sho answers with a serious frown on his face. "It's true, I never met him before. At least, not really..."

"What are you talking about?" the other asks, hopelessly confused by his friend's words.

"I told you about those dreams that I have sometimes, right?" Sho asks. Of course he doesn't tell all the details to his friend, at least he keeps the dirty ones to himself, but the other at least has an idea about Sho's reoccurring dreams.

"The one where you're so in love with someone whose face you cannot remember once you wake up?"

"Exactly those."

"What's with those dreams?" Aiba takes another sip of coffee.

"I think, it's him," Sho blurts out.

"Him?" another raises an eyebrow.

"The young writer! I think he is the one I'm seeing in my dreams," Sho points out, excitedly.

"Eh?!" his room mate starts laughing, causing his friend to frown. "That's impossible! Didn't you say you don't remember the face of the guy in your dreams? And didn't you just say you never met that Ninomiya guy before? And now you suddenly recognize him in your dreams?"

"Yeah, somehow."

"Don't you think that you just dream that guy into your dreams now because you… well, fell for him at first sight in the lecture hall?" Aiba leans over the table to poke Sho's arm teasingly, who just tilts his head for a moment, ignoring the teasing perfectly.

"It can be a possibility, I admit, but I'm sure this is not what is going on," the young assistant professor slowly shakes his head to himself.

"I think you're just madly in love, that's all," Aiba chuckles. "Don't interpret too much from the dreams."

"You're no fun, Aiba."

"I'm being realistic."

"No fun!" Sho repeats smirking and finally takes a bite from his toast.

He doesn't care if his friend Aiba believes him or not. He knows better.


- - + NINOMIYA KAZUNARI + - -


"Do you have any plans for dinner already?" a voice behind Nino asks, pulling him out of his dream world.

The young man turns around, a little confused, his mind still occupied with the things he has just read in the book placed in front of him on the library table. He adjusts his glasses that have slipped down his nose a little and takes in the figure of a young man he met for the first time in his life only yesterday. It was that weirdo of new assistant of his lecturer. Sakurai Something...

"Excuse me?"

The weirdo smiles and lets out a soft chuckle, looking a bit awkward but somehow cute and Nino doesn't know why the hell he suddenly thinks that. He frowns, brushing away the thought instantly and focuses back on Sakurai.

"I'd like to invite you for dinner," the man repeats and without asking he takes the seat at the opposite of Nino's table. "That is, if you're free."

Nino looks at the man with big eyes, finally letting the information that didn't reach him the first time sink in. He frowns again, wondering why the other wants to ask him out for dinner on their second encounter. "What…"

"I want to get to know you better," Sakurai bluntly states, staring at Nino intensively.

Nino lifts his eyebrows, closing his book. "Why?"

"Because you're fascinating me."

Nino doesn't get it. He doesn't get what the man in front of him is saying, what he is thinking to say something like that out loud so straightforwardly. This confuses him immensely. How long have they known each other, for one day? Beside the fact that knowing each other actually requires a bit more than the fact that they have been in the same room for about two hours and will continue to do so for the rest of the semester. Which somehow makes Nino quite nervous, especially after the other man said something like this just now. Nino pulls his courage together, deciding to be straight-forward too to be able to deal with that person

"I'm sorry but…," he starts, crossing his arms and leaning on the table. "Are you hitting on me?"

Sakurai is still looking at him straightforwardly with a dazzling smile, his eyes piercing and Nino feels a lump forming in his throat. He wants to look away, avert his eyes from those of the man in front of him, because they simply makes him nervous. Well, the whole behaviour and presence of that man makes him nervous. Immensely.

"What if I am?" Sakurai asks, his voice sounding soft. Too soft. It sends a confusing shiver down Nino's spine.

He leans back in his seat, finally allowing himself to break the eye contact again and drops his look onto the book he was reading just a few minutes ago. He tries to act cool. "You're pretty blatant, aren't you? Are assistant professors even allowed to hit on students?"

The young man just shrugs his shoulders casually and soon, Nino's eyes naturally find Sakurai's again, as if they draw him like the moths to the flame.

Sakurai grins. "Maybe not, but who cares nowadays? So?"

"So what?" Nino shoots back.

"What's your answer to my invitation?"

Nino takes a deep breath. He still cannot believe what is happening right now. "Sakurai-san… I have to tell you I'm sorry but I already have plans for dinner."

"Oh, OK," the other says, accepting. "So what about tomorrow?"

Unbelievable. "And I have a girlfriend," Nino adds.

"Oh… Oh! That girl is your girlfriend? I had no idea…," the young man concludes, astonished and Nino frowns, wondering if the other has been spying on him since yesterday when he saw him together with Keiko. It's not like they are clinging to each other on the campus.

"Is it that surprising?" he asks huffily, averting his eyes again.

"Oh gosh, no, sorry, that's not what I meant," Sakurai says, a bit abashed, chuckling inevitably.

Nino sighs. He shouldn't be so surprised, maybe. He knows that he and Keiko don't particularly look like a couple to the outside. They barely behave like they are close, especially not in the public. What should surprise him more is why Sakurai still comes up to him, and even asks him out. Does he look like he's interested in men? And even if he was, does Sakurai think that someone will agree to go out for dinner with him so quickly? They barely know each other. They don't even know if they will be able to fill a whole evening with topics to talk about (well OK, literature maybe since they seemed to have this common interest). And why does Nino imagine just now in which kind of restaurant the other will invite him too? He's confused. His brain is thinking nonsense, obviously.

“I... have a girlfriend,” Nino repeats, almost feeling guilty to use his crumbling relationship with Keiko as an excuse.

"I'm sorry then," Sakurai finally says, pulling the young man out of his thoughts. "I just wanted to try my luck."

For some reason, Nino doesn't appreciate the casualness the other now portrays. Doesn't he care more about being turned down? Does this mean he's not been serious? If Sakurai doesn't care and give up so easily on him, why does he even bother to ask him in first place? "Well, please try it with someone else then," Nino finally spits, cursing his thoughts.

"You're pretty cold, aren't you?" Sakurai states, his voice lower and more serious now.

Nino gulps. Maybe, Sakurai does care? But he pretends not to notice. "I don't know how this might concern you."

The young assistant professor gives him this piercing look again but then he tilts his head a little and his look becomes softer, the smile on his face fading, being replaced by... care. "I wonder if you really are cold or if you're just trying to protect yourself."

Nino's heart stops beating for a moment, this actually hits it right there where it hurts. He feels caught. He hates it. "Did you major in Psychology or what's with this analysis now?"

"I just watched you and that's my impression about you," Sakurai points out. "Sorry for being so straightforward."

"Did you just admit that you're stalking me?"

Now there's that cute chuckle back. "You're really too negative, Ninomiya-kun."

"I'm being realistic," the other shoots back.

"Maybe you should change your view of things once in a while. You may be missing something."

"Don't talk as if you actually know me," Nino says, slowly but surely getting unnerved by the other.

Sakurai doesn't answer and just continues looking at him for a few seconds. He leans a bit forward then, supporting his arms on the table in front of him.

"I read your story," he says, suddenly switching the topic, and Nino thinks that this might have been a better start for their conversation, maybe.

"Oh, did you?" he asks casually, pretending not to care.

"Yes, and I have to say that I found it really good. Well written, dreamy and touching."

"Thank you," the student answers, nodding slightly, acknowledging the praise, even if he's still not sure if he wants to continue talking to that man, who confuses him so much. But of course, he's happy to hear those words about his work.

Sakurai then sighs slightly, pursing his lips and a frown adorns his face, as if he is thinking about something troublesome. "But I wonder how the ending is to be interpreted."

He brings his hand together in front of him, the tips of his fingers touching. Nino finds himself staring at those hands. Sakurai has beautiful hands, he thinks before he forces himself to pull his eyes away from them again.

"The ending?" he repeats, his eyes wandering to the man's hands again that now slightly fold. Why the hell is he feeling so attracted to that man's hands?!

"You let the lovers die, both of them," Sakurai points out. "But you let them pray that they meet again in their next life."

Nino nods slightly. "Indeed."

The assistant professor continues his analysis. "And then you write, Then it greens again but I'm seriously wondering if you refer to their love, that they get reborn and meet each other again, or if you just bluntly state that life goes on even after they died."

"What do you think?"

"Well, I'd like to see it like Sakamoto-sensei and interpret it as a sign of hope for their rebirth."

"Then please go on and do so," Nino says, making an inviting gesture with his hand.

"Is that your intention?" Sakurai asks.

"To make others hope?" the student asks and Sakurai nods. "My intention is to make people think about it and to decide themselves. Up to individual interpretation, you know?"

"Do you believe in it yourself? The possibility of reincarnation, I mean."

Nino doesn't answer the question. Instead, after staring at the other for a few seconds, he tries to avoid the topic. "Sakurai-san, please, I have to finish reading this book to prepare for a presentation, could you please…?"

To be honest, he doesn't want to talk about this topic at all, especially not with this guy whom he barely knows. It might be true that his story provides the material to talk about and it is the reader's right to ask questions but Nino feels uncomfortable about it somehow. As if he isn't ready yet to talk about this topic. It's strange. But he feels like he isn't able to give a proper answer at the moment. Probably, he isn't decided about how to interpret his own story yet.

"Sure, sorry for the disturbance," the other finally says after staring at Nino for a few more seconds. He eventually stands up, smiling at him before he finally leaves. "We'll see each other in class then."

"Seems inevitable," Nino murmurs with a sigh, relieved about seeing the other leave.

This was really awkward.

- + -

On the third day after the start of the new semester, the first after studies club activities finally get to start properly on the campus, after the most enthusiastic club members finally gathered enough new members for their clubs to hold a first introduction meeting.

Nino enters the club room of the theatre group, nodding politely at some new excited faces of young students and being greeted by the familiar faces from last year. In the furthest corner, he recognizes Ohno Satoshi, third year student and one of the group's most promising actors, seemingly deep in his own thoughts, like so often. Nino doesn't know him well, everything he knows about that person is that he is very quiet - maybe even shy - except when he is on stage, where he is able to perform the most splendid performances without showing any hints of shyness at all. Though, when Nino steps into the room further and Ohno's attention finally gets drawn on him, the man gets up, approaching him immediately.

"Ninomiya-kun," the older student greets him with a serious look in his eyes.

"Senpai," the young man answers nodding, a bit surprised. It is uncommon for Ohno to approach someone, to talk to someone of his own accord. Usually, when the young man speaks, it's limited to things regarding the play they are working on. "It's been a while, I hope you had a nice holiday."

Ohno ignores Nino's attempt for doing some small talk and immediately gets to the point. "Do you have a moment after club activities? I want to talk to you."

Surprised, Nino shrugs his shoulders. "Sure, coffee at the canteen?"

"Let's go outside. Better this way," the other man says, secrecy lying in his voice.

"Well, sure, as you like," Nino accepts, wondering what his fellow student might need to talk about - especially if he couldn't just say it out loud here, in front of the other club members.

- + -

"This is my story," Ohno simply states when they finally sit down on a bench in the campus' park, paper cups of coffee in each of their hands.

"What? What are you talking about?" Nino frowns.

"I know I'm a bit late but I finally had time to read it. Your short story that won the university's literature contest last month."

"Ah, really, you did? Thank you very much," the younger says, a little embarrassed. "But what do you mean by it is your story?"

"You are telling my story!" the other student repeats, seemingly agitated.

"What?!" Nino asks, a bit shocked. "No! I didn't steal your story I wrote it myself, I swear!"

Ohno quickly shakes his head. "No, no, that's not what I mean. I'm not talking about plagiarism, what I meant is that I experienced this very story," the student tries to set things straight - just that nothing at all seems to be clear after this statement.

"Excuse me?" Nino asks, underlining his serious confusion with frowned eyebrows.

"I mean, you even used my name!"

"Your name?"

"The princess from the large fields, obviously, it's even written with the kanji forOhno, isn't it?" the young man points out.

"Well…," Nino scratches his head. It's true, he used that in his story. Not that he had realized it was actually the same as the surname than the one of his fellow student.

"Tell me, why did you use my name in your story?" Ohno asks, persistent.

"Eh?" Nino seriously wonders, trying to remember what even made him pick this name in first place. To be honest, he cannot remember. At least he didn't use that name with thinking about his fellow student, he just followed his inspiration. "I don't know, it's just what I came up with. And you know, you're not the only Ohno living in Japan, it's not particularly your name," he dares pointing out.

"Then what about the samurai from the pine trees?" Ohno asks in excitement.

"What about him?" Nino asks, of course already assuming that Ohno is talking about another name that he used in his story.

"You used that name too," Ohno points out. Bingo.

"I did," the student confirmed, nodding.

"Why?" Ohno asks and it almost sounds like an offence in Nino's ears.

What was with this questioning?! He felt like being at the police, seriously. A little offended, the younger man reaches to his coffee, taking it in his hand again.

"I don't know, I just came up with it and thought it's fitting to the character?" Nino shrugs his shoulders again, taking another sip of his coffee. Seriously, he had no idea where this strange talk with Ohno is heading to.

"I met someone called Matsumoto just a few days ago," the older man answered, crossing his arms and giving Nino a look as if this will explain everything.

"….And?" the other dares to ask. Well, yes, he can see the relation between the kanji he used and the most common way to write Matsumoto but...

Ohno frees one of his hands, making an excited gesture. "This cannot be a sheer coincidence."

"What else should it be?" Nino chuckles a bit amused. He cannot believe that Ohno is serious about his random picking of names. "This has nothing to do with me. I feel flattered that my story seems to have made such an impact on you but, sorry, don't you think you're interpreting a little too much into it? It's just a story, man…"

"I don't know but… Do you believe in reincarnation, Ninomiya-kun?" the older man asks directly.

Nino looks at him, critically, wondering if this question will cause him even more trouble in the future. He takes a sip from his coffee. Compared to the conversation with Sakurai though, he doesn't want to turn the other away too quickly, he might become angry, Nino thinks. With that he decides to go with a "No?" for the time being.

"Why did you write about it then?" the older student confronts him.

"Why shouldn't I? It's just a romantic idea, isn't it? I'm writing, I'm allowed to use romantic ideas, even if I don't particularly believe in them, don't you think so?" Nino replies.

"Do you believe in something like fate?" Ohno continues.

"No."

"In God?"

"Seriously?" Nino chuckles. "No offence to people who do but, no, definitely not."

"But you want to believe in something, right?" Ohno ask.

For a moment Nino freezes. Is Ohno right? Does he want to believe in something cheesy like reincarnated lovers, like fate connecting people throughout different lives? Is that what makes him wonder if his relationship with Keiko is really everything life can offer in connection with love?

"You sound like you want to sell me your religion," Nino finally murmurs, brushing away his upcoming doubts.

"In fact, I don't care about what you believe in and what you don’t. It's your decision. I'm just wondering. How can someone who doesn't believe in anything write such a story?" the other man looks at him, honestly puzzled. "With those names?!"

"I dreamt about it, that's how I found this story,” Nino bursts. “I just followed my inspiration and wrote it down, that's all."

"You're strange! How can you dream about my life?"

"Are you kidding me?" Nino gives him a critical look before he finally explodes. "Who is the strange one here? You believe you are a princess living in ancient Japan or what?"

"Ah… no, no," Ohno says, waving his hand. He frowns and slightly rubs his forehead as if he tries thinking hard about what to say in order not to make things worse. He doesn't seem to be the type who wants to fight over things. "You know what?" he asks, almost frustrated. "Forget it! I'm just… stunned. Maybe, you should think about reincarnation. I think there is a reason that you came up with this."

"Why does everyone today seem to know what's good for me?" Nino murmurs annoyed in his hands as he buries his face in them, trying to forget the image of Sakurai that just pops up his head.

"Excuse me?" Ohno asks, as he didn't hear the other man's words.

Nino sighs and turns back at the other. "Ohno-san, please don't be upset, but I think you're talking nonsensical stuff and I don't really know what I should think about this now. This is just a story. I like creating stories. There's no deeper meaning behind this. I appreciate that you read the story but I don't really know what you want to tell me with all this. Is it supposed to be a critique? You know, I'm fine with that, I'm still learning."

"I… to be honest, I don't really know myself. I just felt the urge to talk to you about it."

"Did you at least enjoy the story?" Nino tries to wrap up the strange conversation somehow, lifting his eyebrow.

Ohno sits up straight, facing him. "Well, frankly speaking, as you can imagine maybe, I didn't like that the samurai committed suicide after he lost his princess and child. It's too sad and I'm sure the princess would have wanted him to live on."

Nino sits there and looks at his fellow student. He senses some strange sadness in the other's words and even if he knows it isn't necessary, he feels bad about it.

"I'm sorry," he then murmurs, even if he wonders, why the hell he's apologizing now and for what exactly.

For writing a story with a scene that his colleague doesn't like? Or because he feels sympathetic for the other who seemingly identifies a bit too much with the princess in his story? No, why should he feel sorry for that? Ohno is right in front of him in flesh and blood. He is not that princess Nino wrote about, obviously. He has nothing to do with his story. Nothing at all.

"It's not your fault," Ohno then sighs. "It's what happened, after all. And I like the very ending. It's indeed greening again, so to say."

There's a smile on Ohno's face now. Nino frowns again but doesn't talk any longer, not knowing how to react to his fellow student. They keep sitting next to each other until they finished their hot drinks, not exchanging any more words and when Ohno finally stands up and excuses himself, Nino just nods politely in response.

He sighs. So this makes two awkward and confusing conversations with two different people within one day. Considering that he will be meeting up with Keiko later, the possibility of making it a new record with three awkward conversations with three different people, is very high. What a great day.


Chapter 2 – Part 2